Shake it up, Break it up, Tear it up
The Clever Fox and I are broken up. And it’s killing me. It hurts really badly, but I bury it from everyone. Even the Tin Man only has an inkling of how I feel, and the Dreamer has near no idea at all. I suffer in silence on this one, and I wonder how I can fix it. Perhaps I just can’t.
The only one who knows, really, ironically, is The… no.. I’m not naming him. But he knows. I hate that he’s become my closest friend in this, after everything he’s done to me. But he has. Irony of Ironies.
I want to yell and scream and be angry. I don’t find his reasons to be satisfactory, and I want to hate him for it. At the same time, i’m still in love and I want him to see his folly, to love me like I love him.
I don’t think he ever will, though.
The Dreamer… well, he’s another case of my love not being reciprocated. I spend every night with him, I talk to him all the time, I devote so much of my time to him it’s crazy. And the most I can get from him is that he likes me. His actions speak more strongly though… sort of. He refuses to partner me, but he built a world for us. Or rather… I guess, included me in his world, since it was in his brain already.
I’m fighting a really bad depression… trying really really really hard not to fall. I hope there’s someone to catch me when I do.
